Solo female travel Archives - The Bright Eyed Explorer

How Italy changed me

February 18, 2020October 28, 20222 Weeks in Italy, Adventure, Europe, Finding yourself travel, Inspirational Travel, Italy, Solo Adventures, Solo female travel, Solo travel, Travel admin 1 Comment

A story of homesickness, tackling grief and learning to finally love who I am, all while being alone and 15,000 kms from home!

Oh Italy, you changed me! This one is a little emotional……

At the time of visiting Italy, I was quite homesick and just felt this weird sense of unease.

Don’t get me wrong. I did have a fabulous time. Italy was all and more of what I expected. All that fabulous food and wine, the people, the history, the art. All of it so special. So amazing. But there was just something that didn’t sit right for me.

I knew it wasn’t Italy. I knew it wasn’t being on holiday (um the alternative was being back at work – hell no). But I just knew that I was off. Something wasn’t right and I couldn’t figure it out. For a moment there I was worried that I was over doing all this travel thing. Ah of all the dumb things that came to my mind.

It wasn’t until a very close friend from home called me when I was in Florence (she was concerned about my lacklustre replies to her check in messages) that we nutted out my problem.

I missed my mum.

My Italian adventure happened to be my first European trip since my darling mum passed away 15 months prior. Sure, I had gone on other holidays since she passed, but this was my first one to Europe. Usually when I go to Europe, I would check in with her every day. Often calling or FaceTime’ing each other so I could hear her news and tell her about all the exciting things I had seen or done over the last day or so.

Mum was always super interested and keen to know everything I was up to. She would be entertained by my mishaps, interested in my adventures, wanted to know all about the local food and wine and in general, how I was getting along. Almost every call she’d giggle and then ask if I’d met any ‘nice men’. I think she was always far more interested in my adventures than anyone else I know.

Mum had never travelled overseas and thought I was a little crazy having this need to travel every six months. She was often worried about me travelling by myself, but trusted me enough to know I would take care of myself. I like to think by doing so she got to see a little bit of the world through my eyes. Looking at it that way, I have taken her to Indonesia, Norway, Denmark, France, Belgium, Spain, Switzerland, Ireland, UK and Thailand. She was mostly impressed by Paris!

I missed out on all of that this trip and it just did not sit well with me. I felt like I was a pressure cooker ready to explode. Worst though was that I found myself not enjoying my time in Italy as much as I thought I would and then became quite annoyed with myself for doing so. Ahhhh what a mess!

Luckily, that all changed when I could identify what this nagging feeling was (thanks Danielle!). And by doing so I gave myself the chance to work through it. Finally after months of denying myself the chance to feel my grief. I was alone, I didn’t have to hide it from anyone. I could let it all out. And Boy did I let it out! I won’t lie, it was bloody tough. Let me tell you there is nothing like having an emotional breakdown when you’re in a foreign country and SUPPOSED to be having the time of your life to really make you question where you are at in life! What a mess.

But you know what, I somehow I managed to make some clarity of it all and the heart heaviness I was feeling was just a little bit less. I knew I had to make the best this situation so on I went out onto the busy streets of Florence and Rome and enjoyed what time I had left in Italy with the appreciation of being strong enough to have worked through some pretty tough shit. Knowing that mum was always happiest when her children were happy gave me a choice of either choosing the path of letting grief beat me down or carrying on with her love and happiness in my heart.

The sadness of losing my mum will always be there. I am forever a changed woman without having her presence in my life. I am just learning to deal with the grief a little better and know that I need to keep living my best life. For her. For me.

Rome Pantheon — *Living my best life in Italy*

Rome Trevi Fountain — *Living my best life in Italy*

So, for me Italy was a trip of growth (not just the pasta fuelled waistline kind of growth), learning, actually dealing with my grief (instead of hiding or not acknowledging it) and becoming so much stronger and resilient than I ever thought I could be. A chip off the old block really (Aussie slang for meaning that a child is just like one of their parents in character or behaviour). The fire and passion was back in my belly and i’ll be damed if this 40 something year old independent woman wasn’t going to continue to go out and experience the best of life.

What I also took from my trip to Italy was just how much I love the freedom of travel. How much I love getting on a plane and experiencing new places. That I am fortunate enough to be able to have these experiences is never lost on me. I learnt that I really do love throwing myself in the deep end when it comes to travel and feeling, seeing, doing as much as I can. I relearned how much I love being an independent woman with choices. But (and it is a huge BUT) most importantly, after 42 long years, I FINALLY learnt that I am pretty comfortable with who I am and that I love being me.

In the end Italy really grew on me. So much so that I actually found myself not wanting to go home. I will be forever grateful to such a fabulous country for giving me the time and space to let myself have those moments for I feel like I have changed and am better for having had the experience.

I am also really grateful for all the pasta. And the Wine. And the Pizza and gelato and…….

So, thank you Italy. I didn’t know I needed you as much as I did. You’re like a wise old Nona, dishing out the hard love and life experiences, while at the same time loving, nurturing, caring and shoving good food in the faces of those who need your love.

Mangia bene, ridi spesso, ama molto xx

It is the two year anniversary of my mother’s passing from Ovarian Cancer today (19th February). Ovarian Cancer is one of those cancers with a high death rate cancers and limited funding for research. A matter VERY close to mine and my family’s hearts is making donations for research into early detection tests and lifting the survival rate. If you would like to donate to the Ovarian Cancer Research Foundation (OCRF) you can do so here.

To find out more about my experience at Kata Tjuta and my connection to my mum, read: ‘Finding peace and connection in the middle of Australia’

Rome, Italy: An overview of getting lost amongst ancient history

January 28, 2020October 28, 2022Adventure, Europe, Food, Historical sites, History, Italy, Leisure, Rome, Sightseeing, Solo Adventures, Solo female travel, Solo travel, Travel admin

Ah. Rome Italy.

Well I am not sure how this piece is going to go because I am still a little lost for words! Which for those who personally know me, that is kind of really surprising.

Rome kind of has that effect on you.

So much has been written already about Rome, but here is, my take on the ‘Eternal City’

Rome is such a contrast of old and new. Mostly old and for any Australian traveller who loves historical sites, we are like the fat kid in the candy store. I mean our ’oldest’’ building was constructed in 1793!!! Bless our young hearts.

There is literally so much to see and do in Rome and I really don’t know how long is enough time to say you’ve ’done Rome’. I know I missed a lot. Like I didn’t even get to Trastevere which was on my list of must sees. In all honesty, I simply ran out of time and was pretty determined to get in a ‘live like a local, relaxed day in Rome before my 22 hours of flying home.

I will start by saying, I am no history professor, yes, I know a bit BUT what I know is limited. I simply enjoy seeing the historical relics and learning about the history of the country in which I am visiting. I am a bit of a nerd like that! But I really do think that if you travel to a place its respectful to know what has happened there in the past. However long that past may be. Rome’s is long! Plus, I feel you’re doing yourself a disservice not knowing where a country, city or town has come from and what makes it what it is. But that’s me, who am I to judge…….

So, Rome. Oh Rome! All roads lead to Rome. Rome if you want to.. ok I’ll stop now 😉

A history that is diverse and long. Rome is fucking ’ancient’. There, I said it! If it is something you care for, Rome was around before Jesus. Home to numerous Gods and Goddesses and the mighty Roman Empire that conquered most of Europe. It is a city with so much. So much food, so much of Italy, so much of fashion, wine and culture. And most importantly, so much history! History that we know of, and so much that we don’t.

And it is at that last point that I found myself on so many occasions walking around and coming across a ruin of some kind where my mind would wonder. Who was here? What did they do? Was it a goddess who was desired? A god who was loved or feared? A gladiator? A criminal? What happened here?

Rome is a place of historical fact. But it is also a place where your imagination can really come alive. Mine certainly did.

On this trip, I didn’t want to see modern Rome. I’ll leave that for another time. Being in Rome for 4 days meant a lot of ‘roaming’ around and experiencing the city as I wanted to. With what was important for me.

The views and sights

I got lost a lot in Rome. Very easy to do. But getting lost became a massive highlight for me but one in particular was turning off a small cobblestoned street onto a main road (about 2 minutes from my apartment) and seeing the Colosseum. Right there at the end of the main road standing there in all its ancient glory. All an estimated ten-minute walk from where I was. Unbelievable!

The sights in general across Rome are incredible. Taking in centuries of architecture, art and culture. Rome changes from the ancient to the middle ages to modern times at a quick walking pace. Like one minute you’re walking past a building from the last century and then up pops the ruins of what would have been something impressive 2000 years ago. Unbelievable!

Then there’s something like the Pantheon. Which you turn a corner from a side street with buildings that are only (oh dear) a few centuries old and there it is! Just standing there.

And then there’s the Roman Forum. The Spanish Steps. The Knights of the Malta Keyhole. The Gladiator School. The Baths of CaraCalla. The list goes on. And on.

It would be remiss of me to not mention the Vatican. It’s Saint Peter’s Basilica. It’s museums. SO MUCH HISTORY! SO MANY STORIES!

For all parts, Rome and its sights and history really blew this Aussie mind.

On getting lost in Rome

Boy did I get lost!

Thought I’d nailed this getting lost business on day one with a very easy stroll from the train station to my Airbnb. 1 hour later after unpacking and getting settled I venture out to find the local supermarket and got lost on the way. Actually, pretty much as soon as I walked out of the apartment and turned down the street I was lost. Not a great start! I laughed at myself after discovering on the way home from the supermarket, that it should have been a 5-minute walk to get there, took me an hour.

I got so lost on my Vatican City ‘cram in as much of Rome as possible’ day. Several times. Actually, every time I turned a corner!! If you are someone like me who has subpar navigation skills then it is VERY easy to get lost in Rome. But that is half the fun of exploring isn’t it? In my getting lost experience I was able to see things off the tourist trail and immerse myself more so into Roman life.

Like I said earlier, Rome really blew my mind. It is actually hard to articulate the immense power that this city emanates and the impression that it leaves on you. It is impressive. It is powerful. It actually is a wonderful city, filled with so much that at times it is overwhelming. The food (well all of Italian food really), the wine (again, all of Italian wine), the people, even the tourists make for an experience that is something of wonder and amazement.

I will definitely go back to Rome. There is so much I didn’t get to see in my 4 days, more experiences to have. I really want to go back to the colosseum. I really want to spend a whole day at the Vatican. I really want to go to places I didn’t get to. And I really want to eat the food, drink the wine and chat more to the locals.

This Roman story is not over! I will see you again sometime soon Rome.

Stay tuned for more Rome stories over the next few weeks.

Check out the review of the apartment I stayed in while in Rome HERE